God Uses the Evil

Coronavirus. Medical Mandates. 5G. Cancer. Debt. Death. War. The Political Theater.

It’s enough to make you want to crawl in a hole and never come out. And we don’t watch the news.

As sincere, Bible-believing, followers of Jesus, how are we to live?

Opinions vary.

• God is sovereign. Therefore, I can live my life and not worry about what is happening around me.
  • “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8
  • “While people are saying, ‘There is peace and security,’ then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape. ⁴ But you are not in darkness, brothers, for that day to surprise you like a thief. ⁵ For you are all children of light, children of the day. We are not of the night or of the darkness. ⁶ So then let us not sleep, as others do, but let us keep awake and be sober.” 1 Thessalonians 5:3-6
    
  • “But stay awake at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are going to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man.” Luke 21:36
  • “We know that we are from God, and the whole world lies in the power of the evil one.” 1 John 5:19
• Self-preservation. I believe in God, but I have to protect myself and my family at all costs.
  • “For the nations seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. ³³ But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. ³⁴ Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” Matthew 6:32-34
  • “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” John 12:25

This is an excerpt from a blog post I wrote two years ago:

“Yet, in the corrupt, violent days when the judges ruled, God used an ordinary widow and her daughter-in-law faithfully doing ordinary things to preserve the lineage of David, and ultimately Jesus. Having moved back to Bethlehem from Moab during the barley harvest, Ruth faithfully worked and cared for her mother-in-law while God orchestrated her redemption through a kind man named Boaz. Glory in the ordinary.”

Not only does God use the ordinary, He uses the abhorrent. He uses the evil.

After I typed that last sentence, I had to pause. Do I believe that? Do I believe that God actually uses evil?

We’ve been going through the book of Colossians in our weekly fellowship.

Jesus was crucified at the hands of an angry and irrational mob. What was His crime? Did he murder someone? Steal from someone? No. He said something. He said He was the Son of God, the King of the Jews. Can you imagine how His disciples, His brothers, His mother felt in those moments?

I don’t know about you, but I often find myself frustrated, angered, saddened, by the irrational mob that appears to be running our world. What good can come from this evil?

And yet, what was accomplished by Jesus’s death on the cross? The greatest injustice the world will ever know. The greatest evil ever committed. The greatest gift ever given.“As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.” Genesis 50:20

Jesus is King. The victory is His. Be encouraged. Be wise.

“Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.” Ephesians 6:11

A few practical tips in light of recent events:

• Pray for wisdom. “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” James 1:5
• Read God’s Word, the Bible, daily.
• Turn off the news.
• Don’t buy into the hype.
• Do your own research.
• Plant a garden.
• Learn how to build up your immunity naturally:
  • real foods
  • limit/eliminate sugar
  • elderberry syrup
  • vitamins A, D & C
  • colloidal silver
  • lemon juice
  • garlic
  • ginger
  • probiotics through fermented foods
  • essential oils

Thanks for reading. Feel free to drop your favorite verses of encouragement, immune-boosting tips, or questions in the comments.

Get Loud

Last night, I attended a local Conservative Republican Women’s meeting. I am not a registered Republican or Democrat. I don’t agree with a two-party system. I believe that in many ways, the two parties are two heads of the same dragon. However, this particular group invited the founder of the Georgia Coalition for Vaccine Choice, Sandi Marcus, to speak at their gathering and I was, at the very least, curious.

Going into the meeting, I did not know whether the environment would be hostile or welcoming toward Sandi. Based on personal experience and stories from others, I expected hostility. With the exception of one individual who got up and left early in the presentation, the group was surprisingly receptive.

When I first arrived, I was greeted by a woman who recognized me as a newcomer. When I explained that I was there to hear Sandi speak, she warmly asked if I had a personal experience with vaccines/vaccine injury. We continued to talk and it became apparent to me that her goal was the same as mine: truth. How refreshing.

There were two state representatives present at the meeting: Houston Gaines and Marcus Wiedower. If they didn’t know, now they do–and they will be held accountable.

Sandi began her presentation by sharing her “why” — why she started the Georgia Coalition for Vaccine Choice. I will not share the details of her story, because I did not get a chance to ask her permission and it is her story to tell. I will say that she had a personal experience with vaccine injury that led her to found the coalition.

After Sandi and her colleague, Peggy, jumped in to the facts (yes, facts) regarding vaccines, it was hard to keep the meeting on track. While there were a handful of individuals who already knew much of what was shared (so encouraging), many others had never heard any of this information. And their jaws were on the floor. Why haven’t we heard about this? What can we do?

They didn’t know that the childhood vaccine schedule increased from 24 in 1983 to 72 in 2016.

They didn’t know that the National Childhood Vaccine Injury Act of 1986 released all vaccine manufacturers from liability resulting from vaccine injury or death.

They didn’t know that the previous version of the DTaP shot, DPT, was a very dangerous vaccine and that as a result of the numerous injuries and deaths, pharmaceutical companies went to Congress and said, “You have to help us out…” and as a result, we have the act mentioned above, releasing these companies from all liability.

They didn’t know that there isn’t such thing as a “tetanus shot,” but only the DTaP, which is a combo vaccine of diphtheria, tetanus, and pertussis.

They didn’t know that more people have died from the measles vaccine than from the measles in Georgia since 1990. (https://wonder.cdc.gov/)

They didn’t know that there is a system created specifically for reporting vaccine injuries and that a Harvard study determined that less than 1% of injuries/deaths are reported to the Vaccine Adverse Events Reporting System. From the report:

“Adverse events from vaccines are common, but underreported, with less than one percent, reported to the Food & Drug Administration.”

“Unfortunately, there was never an opportunity to perform system performance assessments because the necessary CDC contacts were no longer available and the CDC consultants responsible for receiving data were no longer responsive to our multiple requests to processed with testing and evaluation.”

They didn’t know that the amount paid out to vaccine injured families from the excise tax-funded program (VICP) is $4,158,040,250.41 as of July 1, 2019.

They didn’t know that the CDC did a study in 2004 looking at the relationship between vaccines and autism in African-American boys and found that their chances of becoming autistic increased by 343 times after receiving the MMR vaccine. They didn’t know that this study went in the garbage can. They didn’t know that a CDC employee, William Thompson, came forward as a whistleblower and that on August 27, 2014, this study was handed over to Congress and they haven’t done anything about it.

They didn’t know that there is currently a federal bill in the works (HR2527) mandating all children to be vaccinated per the CDC schedule. Or that there is another federal bill in the works (HR2862) to surveil vaccine records. Per the bill text: “To amend the Public Health Service Act to provide for a national system for surveillance of vaccine rates, to authorize research on vaccine hesitancy, to increase public understanding of the benefits of immunizations, and for other purposes.”

They didn’t know that Facebook, Instagram, Google, and others are censoring vaccine safety information. Instagram is disabling hashtags like #vaccineinjury. When I searched for the coalition’s Facebook page last night, this is what came up on my phone–in this order. Notice that I searched specifically for the Georgia Coalition for Vaccine Choice, not “vaccines” or “health.” Don’t believe me? Try it for yourself.

They didn’t know that some vaccines were cultured in aborted fetal tissue. They didn’t know that these babies had to be born alive in order to use the harvested tissue.

They didn’t know that 30 years ago, vaccine manufacturers were mandated to provide vaccine safety reports biannually to Congress and that in a Freedom of Information Act, it was discovered that in 30 years, not a single report has been submitted.

They didn’t know that not a single double-blind placebo test has ever been done on a vaccine. NOT ONE. Any studies that are referenced compare either two different vaccines or a vaccine to a shot of a vaccine ingredient, like aluminum. When asked about this, they will say that they cannot do a double-blind placebo test on vaccines, because it is unethical to not vaccinate a child. Yet, it isn’t considered unethical to vaccinate thousands of children with a vaccine that hasn’t been tested for safety.

Now what? Pray. Pray. Pray some more. If you are in Georgia, join the Georgia Coalition for Vaccine Choice. No matter where you live, get involved. Join a group. Start a group. Talk to your lawmakers. I stay as far away from politics as I can get away with, but unfortunately, if we are going to win this battle, we have to step onto the battleground.

You may be afraid of what people will say. Your family. Your best friend. I understand. Do it anyway. Do it scared. If we are going to drown out mainstream media and pharmaceutical companies, we have to unify and get loud.

Resources:

Georgia Coalition for Vaccine Choice

The Greater Good

National Vaccine Information Center

NVIC Advocacy (Learn about bills by state here)

ICAN (Informed Consent Action Network)

Rise Mama Rise

FDA Vaccine Package Inserts

CDC Ingredients

VAERS (Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System)

Learn the Risk

Chris Shaw Aluminum Adjuvant Injection Experiment

Seek Truth, Speak Truth: Vaccines

In my last post, I said, “I believe that God is leading me in a direction and I am seeking to be obedient. Lamp to my feet, light to my path; I’m taking this one step at a time.”

So, after much prayer, seeking the Lord, talking with my husband, family and friends, I’m taking the next step. I’m going to discuss vaccines.

Before you roll your eyes and quit reading, please consider the benefits of hearing from someone you may disagree with. If we never considered an opposing position, we’d still be the same people we were last week, last year, or ten years ago. In order to grow, we have to listen to others, think critically about what they are saying, and, if you are a believer, hold up what they say to the standard of Scripture and make a choice to either adopt the belief or abandon it as false. It may be inconvenient or uncomfortable, but neither convenience nor comfort are ideals that we have been called to as believers.

CDC Recommended Vaccine Schedule

Before I dive in, I want to show you this list comparing the vaccine schedules in 1962, 1983 and 2016. As of 2019, the number of CDC recommended doses is 74, compared to three in 1962 and 24 in 1983. Why the substantial increase? It’s not unreasonable to cite the Childhood Vaccine Injury Act of 1986, which freed all vaccine manufacturers from liability resulting from vaccine injury or death, as a possible cause. As a result of this legislation, vaccines became highly profitable.

Where There is Risk, There Must Be Choice

Why am I choosing to speak up now? States are beginning to pass bills mandating the full CDC vaccine schedule–that is 74 vaccines from before birth (given to mother during pregnancy) to 18. Previously, there have been philosophical, religious, and medical exemptions available. These bills make it nearly impossible to get an exemption.

We cannot allow this to happen. Liberty and justice for all. Everyone. Not just those with whom we agree. Find out what bills are currently on the table in your state here.

No matter one’s opinion regarding the safety and effectiveness of vaccines–where there is risk, there must be choice.

“But they are safe…”

This is directly from the FDA M-M-R II (Measles, Mumps, & Rubella) package insert:

“Death from various, and in some cases unknown, causes has been reported rarely following vaccination with measles, mumps, and rubella vaccines;”

“M-M-R II has not been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential, or potential to impair fertility.”

And as for effectiveness,

“As for any vaccine, vaccination with M-M-R II may not result in protection in 100% of vaccinees.”

Do not take my word for it. You can read the FDA inserts for every vaccine here.

The FDA recently approved a 6-in-1 vaccine that is to be given to babies beginning at six weeks of age. Again,

“VAXELIS has not been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential or impairment of fertility.”

Additionally, they tell us that you should not receive this vaccine if you have a history of:

“fever ≥40.5°C (≥105°F), hypotonic-hyporesponsive episode (HHE) or persistent, inconsolable crying lasting ≥3 hours within 48 hours after a previous pertussis-containing vaccine. (5.2)-seizures within 3 days after a previous pertussis-containing vaccine. (5.2)”

How can they know about a child’s reaction to something they have never received and when they are only six weeks of age?

VAERS (Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System) was set up by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services to track adverse reactions to vaccines. Additionally, there is an excise tax on every vaccine administered that goes into the VICP (Vaccine Injury Compensation Program) fund to pay out to those who are adversely affected by vaccines. There is risk and the pharmaceutical companies, as well as the government, are well aware. Why else would these programs exist? Where there is risk, there has to be choice.

Ingredients

According to the CDC website, various vaccines can include: aluminum, mercury (thimerosal), formaldehyde, antibiotics, monosodium glutamate (MSG), human fetal cells (listed as human diploid), GMOs, animal proteins and DNA, glyphosate (Roundup) and preservatives such as Polysorbate 80.

These are directly from the CDC website:

Vaccine Injury

You may have a fully- or partially-vaccinated child who did not suffer any adverse effects. This does not mean that vaccines are safe for everyone. We all have a different genetic makeup and whereas one child may be able to more effectively and/or rapidly detoxify certain vaccine ingredients (such as heavy metals mercury and aluminum), others cannot. And there is no way to know until after the vaccines have been administered and the child suffers an injury or worse.

There is a documentary that was released in 2011 entitled The Greater Good. It is currently on YouTube and follows three families that have suffered vaccine injury. Please take the time to listen to their stories.

Maybe a child doesn’t have autism or experience seizures. But what about speech delay? Asthma? These conditions have become more widespread as the vaccine schedule has grown.

“Today, some 15 percent of school children suffer from asthma. The point is, we haven’t eradicated sickness with vaccines, we haven’t even stopped inflammatory lung disease with the pertussis vaccine, we have just traded an acute, self-limiting illness for a chronic, never ending battle.” (Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby & Child Care, Morell, Cowan, MD).

Sanitation and Hygiene

What about polio? Generations before us credit the polio vaccine for eradicating polio. In looking at history, we see that polio had already started to decline by at least 90% due to public sanitation and hygiene in the early 1950s and the vaccine was introduced in 1955. Similarly, diphtheria declined drastically before the introduction of a vaccine. Cases of smallpox actually increased after the introduction of a mandatory smallpox vaccine in the 1860s and “decreased only after an organized uprising by parents and doctors forced European governments to end their mandatory vaccination programs.” (Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby & Child Care, Morell, Cowan, MD). Typhoid and scarlet fever died out on their own without a vaccine.

Follow the Money

I mentioned earlier that vaccines became highly profitable for manufacturers in 1986 when they were released from all liability. I also shared that when a vaccine is administered, there is a tax collected that goes into a fund specifically for the purpose of compensating families who experience adverse reactions to a vaccine. This means that families are funding these payouts, not the pharmaceutical companies. They carry no risk. You can view the April 2019 financial statements for the VICP fund here. Not only are they not responsible for compensating the affected families, but they are profiting from the excise tax. In April 2019 alone, the VICP earned $8.6M in interest revenue. According to the International Trade Administration, the pharmaceutical industry is making more than a trillion dollars in profits yearly. I am for businesses making profit, but not at the expense of others’ life, liberty, and property.

We are one of the only countries that allows drug advertising. Merck spent $100 million in marketing for Gardasil (HPV/cervical cancer vaccine) the first year it was released. It was set to undergo a four-year trial, but after 15 months, the creators of Gardasil approached the FDA about getting it fast-tracked and the FDA agreed. The trial ended and Gardasil was released to the public. It was initally for women ages 19-26. Then they changed the age range to 9-26. Now it is recommended for boys 9-26. And soon it will be added to the infant schedule. Even if it was a safe vaccine, immunity only lasts five years. Why would they give a HPV vaccine to infants? Who stands to benefit? According to a Washington Post article in 2015, Pharma spends more money on marketing than it does on research.

What can you do?

No matter where one is on this journey, one can always be more informed. Don’t depend on mainstream media to inform decisions. Do the legwork. Read the package inserts, research studies, sign up for email updates from the National Vaccine Information Center (NVIC), find out what bills are in the works in your state. Maybe you agree with some vaccines, but disagree with others. Mandates don’t allow you that choice. All 74 vaccines will be required if these laws are passed. Fight for parental choice. Share what you learn with people you care about and know that you are not alone in this fight.

Learn More:

The Greater Good

National Vaccine Information Center

NVIC Advocacy (Learn about bills by state here)

ICAN (Informed Consent Action Network)

Rise Mama Rise

FDA Vaccine Package Inserts

CDC Ingredients

VAERS (Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System)

Learn the Risk

Chris Shaw Aluminum Adjuvant Injection Experiment

Hate Your Life

And Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Truly, truly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him.” John 12:23-26

I haven’t planned out what this post is going to look like from beginning to end. I believe that God is leading me in a direction and I am seeking to be obedient. Lamp to my feet, light to my path; I’m taking this one step at a time.

Do you hate your life in this world? I bought a wall hanging a few years back that said, “Be in love with your life.” I meant for it to remind me to be thankful for the life God has given me. What it should say is, “Be in love with your God.” It’s no secret that we are inundated with the message, “Do what you love.” “Life is too short to be unhappy.” “Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.” “Be in love with yourself.” …and the list goes on. It sounds good, right? But like Shift in C.S. Lewis’s The Last Battle, “By mixing a little truth with it they had made their lie far stronger.”

The world is telling us, “The fear of self is the beginning of wisdom.” God tells us in Proverbs 1:7, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.” We are to “bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2). Paul tells us in Romans 12, “Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.”

A Bible study leader once shared this thought: when we fear another person, care what they think, want what they have, we are saying that we care more about ourselves or about the things they have than we do about them.

In the last 10 years, we have completely detached ourselves from mainstream media. Some might accuse us of having our heads in the sand. Rather, we say that we much prefer being uninformed to being misinformed. While this hasn’t changed, we have become aware of current events that negatively affect our families and generations to come. Thus far, our position has been to do what we believe is right and if people ask questions or are interested, we are willing to share. We have believed this to be sufficient, until now.

I referenced C.S. Lewis’s book, The Last Battle, above. I finished reading this book for the first time two nights ago. Over the last few weeks, I’ve been wrestling with how to face these threats to our families. Continue to live our life and speak when spoken to? Take to social media? Seek out personal conversations with people in our circle? What if it puts a target on my family? I can’t risk the safety of my children. As these thoughts rolled around in my head, my eldest and I began reading The Last Battle.

Without retelling the whole story, the Narnians have been fooled into believing that a donkey dressed in a lion’s skin is Aslan. Shift the Ape is his puppeteer and is in cahoots with the Calormenes to take over Narnia. The Narnians are helping to accomplish this evil plot against them by obeying who they wrongly believe to be Aslan. The lone seven who know (and believe) the truth, King Tirian, Jewel the Unicorn, Jill, Eustace, Puzzle the Donkey, Poggin the Dwarf, and Farsight the Eagle have just learned that Cair Paravel has been taken by the Calormenes. They have already tried to convince the Dwarfs of the truth by showing them Puzzle the Donkey, dressed in the lion skin. Aside from Poggin, they don’t want any part of it.

“We’re on our own now. No more Aslan, no more Kings, no more silly stories about other worlds. The Dwarfs are for the Dwarfs,” they said.

Now, the seven stand alone and must decide what to do. After a long silence, Jewel speaks up.

“Nothing now remains for us seven but to go back to Stable Hill, proclaim the truth, and take the adventure that Aslan sends us.”

Jill and Eustace, who have been sent to Narnia from England, consider what will happen to them if they die in Narnia. Jill concludes, “I was going to say I wished we’d never come. But I don’t, I don’t, I don’t. Even if we are killed. I’d rather be killed fighting for Narnia than grow old and stupid at home and perhaps go about in a bath-chair and then die in the end just the same.”

As I finished reading this tale, God also gave me Luke 9:23-24. “And He was saying to them all, ‘If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who will save it.’”

As I considered this story and Jesus’s words, I realized that if God is calling us to stand up for truth, then we must. We must. And to not do so for fear of our children’s safety, we are doing two things: (1) not trusting God with them and (2) putting the battle in their hands and the hands of future generations.

In the end, the seven suffered death in Narnia. But they were immediately with Aslan in the true Narnia. The real Narnia.

Amidst the fight, Tirian told Jill: “But courage, child: we are all between the paws of the true Aslan.” They believed that Narnia was worth fighting for. They hated their life in this world.

Why do I tell you all of this?

Because I want us to hate our lives. I want us to fight for truth. I want us to quit being offended when someone disagrees with us. I want us to be willing to be wrong so that we can learn better and do better. I want us to love the people around us more than we care what they think about us. I want us to stop self-preserving. Stop being afraid. “And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” Matthew 10:28

Seek truth. Speak truth.

Be Inconvenienced

As many of you know, New York recently passed legislation that allows for late-term abortions. Media has a strong hold on our behavior, doesn’t it? Did you also know that New York is not the first or only state to do so? There are nearly a dozen other states that permit late-term abortions.

Social media arguably has its benefits. It assuredly has its flaws. Many people who consider themselves “pro-life” have a renewed fervor in the fight for life in light of this new legislation. I would encourage you to not let that fire die out with an impassioned Facebook post, but rather consider what you can do in your local community to elicit change. Social media posts are convenient, easy, and make us feel good about ourselves. Loving others takes time, energy, and sacrifice.

“By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:35

Here are some ways that you can advocate for life in your community:

1. Build relationships with young people in your community. If you are older, go spend time with a young person. You may think that they won’t be interested, but I think young people today are hungry for something real and as a member of an era that has long since passed, you can offer experiences and stories that they desperately need. If you are younger, go spend time with a friend—in person. Don’t send a text or tweet or snapchat; go have coffee together, look each other in the eye, ask hard questions and be willing to give real answers. Relationships matter.
2. Partner with a local pregnancy care center. I’ve had the privilege of being involved with two different pregnancy care centers in two vastly different communities. Your community is unique and will therefore have unique needs. Find out what they are and give out of what you’ve been given—time, finances, resources, skills. You can find a center near you here. (If you are in the Durham/Chapel Hill area, please contact PSS. If you are in the Barrow County, GA area, please contact Come Alive Ministries.)
3. Pray about becoming a foster or adoptive parent.
4. Educate yourself. Don’t let the media dictate what you believe to be true.

“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge; because you have rejected knowledge, I reject you from being a priest to me. And since you have forgotten the law of your God, I also will forget your children.” Hosea 4:6

Love is inconvenient. Be inconvenienced.

Guest Post: Catalyst

If there is one word to describe my wife’s influence on my life, it would be “catalyst.” Anna is the most passionate person I know. She has an unwavering resolve to know truth and to do what is right in the eyes of the Lord. She is constantly weighing “what is” against what Scripture says “should be.” I love this about her.

Proverbs 31:11-12 says,

“The heart of her husband trusts her and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.”

What an incredible blessing it is to trust your wife and know that she is truly seeking God in every aspect of life. Anna is my sounding board. I know that I can share anything with her – life’s struggles, triumphs, difficult questions, or even personal burdens – and she will always point me to the truth of Scripture. She is not afraid to speak truth into my life even when I don’t want to hear it. In our relationship we rarely brush problems under the rug. We deal with them. This is in large part due to Anna’s commitment to truth and real, genuine, God-honoring relationship. Despite what the world says, this does me good, not harm. In a world full of peace-keeping, shallow-thinking girls who want to look exactly like their “friend” on social media, it is refreshing to have a peace-making, critically-thinking woman whose aim is to look like Jesus no matter what the world tells her she should look like.

The God-given gift of marriage is a humbling experience. It has revealed my selfishness, my weaknesses, and my need for accountability through Christ-centered relationship. Anna has challenged me in countless ways. Her passion has sparked boldness in my life that I didn’t know was in me. Her fervor for truth has ignited in me a yearning for Godly wisdom and knowledge. Her principled thought has forced me to think about the reasons behind the decisions that I make. The seriousness with which she takes her job as a mother and the way she selflessly and tirelessly serves our children inspires me to be the father that God has called me to be. Her heart for those who don’t know Jesus is a frequent reminder of the depravity of sin, our need for a Savior, and the call for Christ-followers to be a light in a dark world.

That God would choose to use my beautiful, loving, and devoted wife to sharpen my faith and point me to Jesus is nothing short of a blessing. I can’t imagine my life without her. I am so thankful for my bride.

Happy 31st Birthday, my love!

God is…

Today I wrote down everything in my life that is frustrating and discouraging me. Then, in big letters, I wrote, “BUT GOD IS STILL GOOD. ALWAYS.”

Below is a list of words or phrases that follow the words, “God is…” in the Bible. I hope this encourages you.

God is…

with you

giving for you an inheritance

not man

a consuming fire

a merciful God

in your midst

God of gods and Lord of lords

he who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies, to give you the victory

making with you today [a covenant]

your dwelling place

providing you a place of rest

among you

my strong refuge

greater than all gods

gracious and merciful and will not turn away his face from you, if you return to him

for good on all who seek him, and the power of his wrath is against all who forsake him

greater than man

mighty

clothed with awesome majesty

a righteous judge

our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble

the King of all the earth

my helper

for me

a refuge for us

our salvation

good

the strength of my heart and my portion forever

a sun and shield

holy

the one you must fear

my strength and my song

an everlasting rock

righteous in all the works that he has done

in your midst, a mighty one who will save

able

true

one

for us

faithful

wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men

not a God of confusion but of peace

not mocked

not unjust

treating you as sons

light

greater than our heart

love

“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good,
    for his steadfast love endures forever.”  Psalm 136:1

I Must Decrease

I recently put into words these two thoughts about myself (warning: they aren’t pretty):

• I would rather be a “lesser” version of myself than allow God to change me, because I fear that I will be expected to always be the changed/improved/better version of myself and when I fail, I will be a disappointment.
• I tend to self-preserve and “fight for my rights” more than I should, because I am afraid that if I don’t, I will disappear.

Ugly, right?

This morning was a hard one.  We go to the local pregnancy care center, where I work part-time, on Tuesday mornings.  L got up at 4:30 AM and wouldn’t go back to sleep.  K woke up at the height of emotion–everything was a crisis.  And then she had an accident–before she even ate breakfast.  So, I decided we would stay home and try again another time.

As I was folding laundry, I began praying.  Praying for God to redeem the day.  Then I started praying about the thoughts I shared above.  Specifically, the second one.  This passage came to mind:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”  Matthew 5:3

Jesus did not fight for His rights.  He served.  He loved.  He did not defend Himself to avoid the cross.  The truth is–if by serving, loving, giving, I “disappear,” but Jesus appears, what could be better than that?

“He must increase, but I must decrease.”  John 3:30

How does this happen?  By immersing yourself in the Word of God, praying always, and the power of the Holy Spirit.

Parenting brings out my ugly like nothing ever has.  I’m so thankful for God’s constant pursuance and that I stand holy and blameless before Him in Christ.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him.”  Ephesians 1:3-4

The Joy of Christmas

I love Christmastime.  I always have.  Something about lights and cozy scarves and warm drinks–it’s like nothing bad can happen.

A few years ago I read an article by Tony Reinke where he shared a letter that Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote to his parents in December of 1943 from a Nazi prison.  Bonhoeffer says,

Viewed from a Christian perspective, Christmas in a prison cell can, of course, hardly be considered particularly problematic. Most likely many of those here in this building will celebrate a more meaningful and authentic Christmas than in places where it is celebrated in name only.

As someone who really enjoys the comforts of Christmas, this really convicted me.  What is Christmas about–truly?  How often do we say it’s about Jesus, but then we don’t really live that out?

I’m thankful that my parents were very intentional about making Christmas morning about Jesus before it was about anything else.

We aren’t putting up a tree this year.  It didn’t really make sense to us since we won’t be in our home Christmas morning and L is quite the little explorer.  In years past, this would have really bummed me out.  Instead, this year feels more “like Christmas” than ever before.  Starting December 1st, we began reading The One True Light by Tim Chester to prepare our hearts for Christmas Day.  I’ve never done an advent calendar or readings before, but in just two days, I already feel more centered and focused on Christ than I have before during this season.

As a mom, I desire so much for my girls to seek Jesus in everything.  We talk about Him day in and day out–how He will help K be obedient if she asks Him to and how He loves her and is always with her.  I desperately want her to be desperate for Him.  Now that she is old enough to participate in family discussions and ask questions (seriously–she blows me away), it makes Christmas that much more significant to me.  I don’t want it to be about Santa or Christmas lists.  I don’t want to have to undo anything when she gets “old enough to understand.”  She has been learning since the day she came into this world and I don’t want to waste a moment teaching her anything other than the truth.  I am not judging those who choose to do Santa with their kids–I am simply sharing my heart for this season and what we feel is right for our family.

There’s certainly nothing wrong with enjoying this temporal world so long as it doesn’t interfere with our understanding of the spiritual world.  In fact, I believe God created this temporal world to be always pointing us to the spiritual.

This afternoon we spent time together listening to Christmas music, drinking homemade hot chocolate, and putting up a few decorations.  It’s a wonderful time of year.  I hope that you can enjoy this season with your family and friends as you fix your eyes on our one true hope–Jesus.  Merry Christmas, friends!

Catching Up

Hello stranger.

Life’s been a little hectic lately between getting ready to move (one more week!), starting to wean my girl (where did the time go?!) and getting ready for an annual fundraiser with my part-time job.

In the coming months, you can expect an increase in posts as we’ll be embarking on our new farmhouse life! Chris will be building us a mobile chicken coop and planting our first legit garden soon after we move in, so there will be lots of fun stuff to write about.

Also, we’ve been able to watch a series called “Quest for the Cure Continues” about alternative cancer treatment (and prevention).  We plan to purchase this series so that we can watch it again and share it with our friends and family.  As we review each episode, I plan to post about it here for anyone who’s interested in learning this information.  I think you’ll find it very eye-opening.

And as always, here are a few photos of my precious gift from God.  Enjoy!

so much drama!

chuggin’ that milk

standin’ all by myself